Cam French

96 Tears

                                  Stranglers – 96 Tears

                                       

Judy was name-dropping and recently published a favourite letter she received from our beloved Eric Rutherford Murray.

I have an anecdote, again, credit to Roy Hughes from Canada’s Bridge Warriors.

Now I know “Stoney” is one of Judy’s favorites, and obviously she has some fondness for ERM too. According to Hughes, this yarn “provided Murray with one of his favourite stories.” I sumbit it in the spirit ERM reveled in it, pure, unadulterated joy. Stony’s reaction is merely the cherry on top. You be the judge.

 

Murray held:  Jxxx K109xx 6x 5x 

Kehela (the dealer) passed, Crawford bid 1D and “intuiting that it was time to introduce a diversion, Murray doubled for takeout.”

The auction:

Kehela   Crawford     Murray      Stone

Pass           1D           Dble!        Rdble

Pass            Pass         1H           2NT (see that bid!)

Pass            3NT         All pass.

Opening lead: 8H.  This was the layout:

                       Q10x

                       Ax

                       KJ10x

                       A109x

Kxx                                     Jxxx

8xx                                     K109xx

Qxx                                    xx

Qxx                                     xx

                       Axx

                       QJx

                       A9xx

                       KJx

“Dummy played low and Murray inserted the nine, losing to declarer’s jack. Stone crossed to the dummy and took a finesse through Murray. Kehela won the trick with the queen he wasn’t supposed to have and played another heart to dummy’s ace. Stone then took another finesse through Murray. Kehela produced a second queen that he couldn’t possibly have. A third heart allowed Murray to cash out the suit whereupon Stone started screaming “This idiot. This moron. Who would ever dream that anyone could make such an ignorant bid?”

One man’s ignorant is another man’s brilliance. Stone was never famed for being the proverbial “kinder, gentler”, but here, he went postal. Therein lies ERM’s true joy, his ploy would have been for naught against  lesser opponent.

Perhaps in his old age they both might look back with a fresh perspective after all they say time heals old wounds.


46 Comments

Judy Kay-WolffApril 7th, 2010 at 11:36 pm

Cam:

Putting aside my warm feelings for both Eric and Stoney (from whose apartment Bobby and I just returned an hour ago), I fail to see the humor in posting a hand like this — even decades after the incident. In fact, I actually view it as cruel and offensive. Had Eric, with his shenanigans, ended up going for a number: (1) I doubt whether Sami or their teammates would have found it amusing; (2) It would not have appeared in “Canada’s Bridge Warriors;” and (3) It would not have given you fodder for your blog.

The funny thing about the characters involved — my Norman could have been on either side, having played on teams with both Stone and Crawford as well as Murray and Kehela. Sorry, but if tales like these amuse your readers, I must have no sense of humor and consider it in very poor taste. To make a ninety-one year old bridge icon the butt of your joke is truly disgusting!

Judy Kay Wolff

Cam FrenchApril 8th, 2010 at 3:28 am

Judy,

You are a passionate person. I like that. This time – you shot high and wide and missed.

I will not respond with what seem to be your favorite adjectives “disgusting” and “dispicable”.

One man’s humor is another’s pain I suppose. I did not make him “the butt of my joke” – he did that all by himself. Shoot the messenger, or are some of our skeletons too precious to look back on? I guess his age makes him bullet-proof to reporting. I bet he would laugh today. Wanna wager?

You are merely upset because I reported your beloved Stony’s outburst. I note you did not say he was right, or he was wrong, just slam the messenger for reporting so. BTW, call Roy Hughes too, as I quoted and cited much of the passage from his book. I have news for you – writers write -and sometimes feelings are bruised.

I guess what Stoney said was fine. no doubt in your mind because he is the mythical Tobias Stone – he can say that and because I am not – I can’t. I get it now – thanks for clarifying.

You said in an earlier posting:

Nobody’s perfect — not even Canadians.

Sometimes, the truth hurts.

Well stated. No one is perfect – not even Stoney, nor you, nor me.

It is not my fault he went crazy. But I get the blame for it. How do you feel about his “active ethics”? Or is it just about the rest of us well down the food chain?

I will bet Stoney will look back on that with laughter. ERM does. The fact that you can’t, and take a special pleasure in slamming me, well…that speaks to you.

Have a nice night. And as Bobby told me to call Sami – maybe you might call Stoney and realize time has healed some wounds. Obviously, not all. Say hi for me and from ERM to Stoney. He won’t have your bitterness and anger.

And I hope for your sake – he doesn’t shoot the messenger.

C

Judy Kay-WolffApril 8th, 2010 at 6:35 pm

From One Messenger to Another:

You can be sure I answered the above the second my eyes spotted it last night. However, it either went into the Spam folder or was erased (which I seriously doubt) as it did not appear as Comment 3.

I do not have the time or interest to re-compose it as it was rather lengthy. The gist of it was that I felt it was tasteless and downright cruel to recant that story about a bridge icon like Tobias Stone. Most of the world’s bridge populace (writers, authors, columnists, so-called experts or wannabes who blog or comment) don’t and will never play well enough to have shined Stoney’s shoes in his prime. Besides, just like all of us, I am sure there are countless Cameron French bridge atrocities you would not want to see publicized on a world bridge site. It was you, not I, shooting below the belt, and I felt it was totally indiscreet — and perhaps one more example of the Canada v. U. S. undercurrent which seems to be the prime subject of your recent offerings.

I don’t share your mean sense of humor and I really don’t give a rat’s ass if it were written by Roy Hughes or J.C., but history has shown that such action soothes the egos of those who inwardly feel inferior — but by attempting to make others look smaller — resultantly enhance their own image (from their personal vantage point). Shame on you for picking on a ninety-one year old revered Hall of Famer who was brilliant, ethical and played by the rules!

Jeff SmithApril 8th, 2010 at 6:52 pm

Assuming 2NT was forcing in their methods (and I am sure it was), where does Judy think TS erred? It seems that every action he took was reasonable, and he got taken my a psych, give the hand to 100 experts, I suggest 99 or so of them would have bid the same way and played the hand in a similar fashion as TS…all world class players have at one time or another been taken by a psych. I don’t think its at all embarrassing to fall victim to such a ploy, and in fact the exact opposite! If a world class player such as ERM psyched against me, I would consider it a compliment of the highest order!

Nothing in this article stuck me as vindictive or mean spirited, but merely a cute bridge story that would have been funny if fictional and was made even more entertaining by the fact that it occurred in real life.

Cam FrenchApril 8th, 2010 at 8:38 pm

Jeff,

Your comment reminded me of a funny story.

Many moons ago good player asked me to play in the local club game. I was enchanted. He said to me – “I only have one rule – you never psyche against weak opponents, you don’t need it and it turns them off the game. ”

That stuck with me and soon became well accepted at the club.

One night a novice friend came over and she was bubbling with energy – and we could tell she wanted to share a hand of glory. She said “X” psyched against ME!!

We stood there silently until she explained the ramifications.

“Well everyone knows you don’t psyche against weak players – so I MUST be a good player if he psyched against me!”

She was delirious and we celebrated her joy.

C

Judy Kay-WolffApril 8th, 2010 at 10:35 pm

Jeff:

You miss my point completely. It has nothing to do with giving the hand to experts. I am not interested in anyone’s critique of the auction or play. It was strictly Mr. French’s insensitivity to making an aged bridge legend the goat of his tale. Maybe that provided pleasure for him. I found it offensive. I have a great sense of humor — but this exceeded my limits.

His tattered “Norfolk” mission has gotten to be old hat so maybe this is his new theme — poking fun at others publicly. Whatever floats one’s boat!

Judy

Nick KrnjevicApril 9th, 2010 at 5:57 am

Cam;

I echo Jeff’s assessment of your summary of Roy’s ERM anecdote: it’s an amusing description of one great player successfully psyching against another great player.

Cheers.

BlairApril 9th, 2010 at 9:27 am

All humor is based upon misfortune befalling someone or thing, everytime, as in always, etc., etc., etc. Such is this story. Perhaps it’s a story that now should be told by Eric, as he best knows the conditions that have befallen his once great opponent, Tobias Stone. Perhaps today he would rather praise Ceasar than bury him. Perhaps Cam could ask Eric and report back what the big guy said?

Cam FrenchApril 9th, 2010 at 9:48 pm

Judy wrote the below and it merits a response. I would say the words offended me, but that is inaccurate. How about they motivated me to look at the basis of the below rant.

Judy, you may (or may not) know I do not intimidate easily. I am not a world class player and never claimed to be. But I can smell a story, a rat and intimidation or rudeness a mile away. I am genuinely saddenned that my “attempt at humor” resulted in so many harsh words. But, I look on the bright side – you made me smile.

Judy wrote:

Putting aside my warm feelings for both Eric and Stoney (from whose apartment Bobby and I just returned an hour ago), I fail to see the humor in posting a hand like this — even decades after the incident. In fact, I actually view it as cruel and offensive. Had Eric, with his shenanigans, ended up going for a number: (1) I doubt whether Sami or their teammates would have found it amusing; (2) It would not have appeared in “Canada’s Bridge Warriors;” and (3) It would not have given you fodder for your blog.

The funny thing about the characters involved — my Norman could have been on either side, having played on teams with Stone and Crawford as well as Murray and Kehela. Sorry, but if tales like these amuse your readers, I must have no sense of humor and consider it in very poor taste. To make a ninety-one year old bridge icon the butt of your joke is truly disgusting!

…. The gist of it was that I felt it was tasteless and downright cruel to recant that story about a bridge icon like Tobias Stone. Most of the world’s bridge populace (writers, authors, columnists, so-called experts or wannabes who blog or comment) don’t and will never play well enough to have shined Stoney’s shoes in his prime. Besides, just like all of us, I am sure there are countless Cameron French bridge atrocities you would not want to see publicized on a world bridge site. It was you, not I, shooting below the belt, and I felt it was totally indiscreet — and perhaps one more example of the Canada v. U. S. undercurrent which seems to be the prime subject of your recent offerings.

I don’t share your mean sense of humor and I really don’t give a rat’s ass if it were written by Roy Hughes or J.C., but history has shown that such action soothes the egos of those who inwardly feel inferior — but by attempting to make others look smaller — resultantly enhance their own image (from their personal vantage point). Shame on you for picking on a ninety-one year old revered Hall of Famer who was brilliant, ethical and played by the rules!

___________________________________________________________

Look at the above. Unlike Oprah, I don’t “feel the love. Let’s look at the accusations one at a time.

: I fail to see the humor in posting a hand like this.

Well I do and ERM did. Humor, like art or music is individualistic. Just for laughs, if Belladonna or Garrozo had been Murray’s “victim” would that now make it acceptable or heavens forbid – funny?

: I actually view it as cruel and offensive.

IMHO it is neither. You feel otherwise. Got it.

: (1) I doubt whether Sami or their teammates would have found it amusing; (2) It would not have appeared in “Canada’s Bridge Warriors;” and (3) It would not have given you fodder for your blog.

(1) You have no idea. ERM loved it – and I submit he would have loved it being on the other end. Who knows? (2) I can’t say. Roy Hughes wrote the book and it was not all hands they did well on. (3) If I had not seen it, I couldn’t have used it. You are right about that.

: I must have no sense of humor (OK) and consider it in very poor taste. That is your right.

: To make a ninety-one year old bridge icon the butt of your joke is truly disgusting.

So if he was 21 or 31 or 55 or deceased – would it then be ok? Our elder statesmen cannot be reported upon? Wow. Disgusting? No. Funny – yes.

: Most of the world’s bridge populace (writers, authors, columnists, so-called experts or wannabes who blog or comment) don’t and will never play well enough to have shined Stoney’s shoes in his prime.

Now we grant survivor’s “immunity” to Stoney because we “can’t shine his shoes?”

Listen to yourself.

Like the President can’t be criticized – or the Pope or the Prime Minister because…..well, their lofty titles/roles/stature grants them an exemption from disapproval? Free speech, dissention, criticism is what America and democracies in general are all about. No one gets a free pass.

…. perhaps one more example of the Canada v. U. S. undercurrent which seems to be the prime subject of your recent offerings….

I love America, enjoy the friendship of many Americans and although I used the word “poach” I might have said lure, entice or recruit. There is no Canada-USA “undercurrent” except in your imagination.

: To make a ninety-one year old bridge icon the butt of your joke is truly disgusting!

Firstly, it was never a joke. It was a yarn, a story. Stoney was not 91 then, and he is not the butt of anything. Is it the ploy by ERM you find offensive? (No) It is the reporting of Stoney’s meltdown and his diatribe that has your knickers in a knot. That is my fault? I plead guilty to re-telling a story.

I am sure there are countless Cameron French bridge atrocities you would not want to see publicized on a world bridge site.

Sadly, there are many indeed. But they are misplays, poor bids, lousy leads, silly technical errors and misguided defenses. No “moron, idiot, ignorant” tirades to find. And just for laughs, if ANYONE were to say such things to you at the table – just how would you feel? There is no entitlement to rudeness, aged 21 or 101. Or did you miss that part of the Laws of the game?

I don’t share your mean sense of humor.

I can see that. ERM does and so do others and I object to it being called “mean”. How can a hand be mean? Does Bob Hamman cry (wolf or 96 tears?) every time someone reprints the famous hand of his unfortunate choice of opening leads against the grand slam? I don’t think so. It is just a hand.

…but history has shown that such action soothes the egos of those who inwardly feel inferior….

Well I missed that history lesson but to my way of thinking someone (can’t shine his shoes/disgusting/mean/cruel/offensive) is sure trying to intimidate and occupy a higher moral ground. Your language suggests more than mere anger, and it is not the hand, it is the reporting of Stoney’s tantrum. I hope you feel better shooting at the messenger.

Shame on you for picking on a ninety-one year old revered Hall of Famer who was brilliant, ethical and played by the rules!

Which rules do “moron and idiot” fall under? He may have been a brilliant brain surgeon – so what? We can’t shine his shoes! Pass the polish. He is ‘untouchable”. No one is picking on anyone except you on me. So if it was Rodwell, or Zia or Ira (the Beast) who had the meltdown – and not the 91 year-old icon 40 years ago – all would be well?

Murray pulled off a swindle. The fact that his victim was a world class player with a temper added value and dare I say humor to the story does not make it mean, disgusting or offensive.

I will tell you what. This is not about your beloved Stoney. I regret that it caused you such anguish. That said, I understand why ERM loved the story so, and it was made funnier by your beloved Stoney. Perhaps he will look back on it with fondness too.

This is the game we love. It has classical moments. It has heartbreak and glory, passion and pride. There is no meanness in a hand, or in reporting one. Let’s kiss and make-up.

If not, pass the polish and maybe we can agree to disagree.

C

BOBBY WOLFFApril 10th, 2010 at 12:03 am

Hi Cam,

It is not my intention to take a side in the flap about Murray v. Stone mainly because, assuming there is pent up emotion about many things in competitive bridge, including either saving face or being extra careful about hurting feelings, one would have to be a psychological magician to avoid some of these conflicts while blogging.

HOWEVER, perhaps you can explain to me how others, in this case your Canadian (probably but not for sure) friends who in one blogging breath accuse me of contrived traits from here to izzard, without any real knowledge of anything, except that perhaps they think it fashionable. Then when presented with the facts, which they KNOW are true, either clam up or vanish. Then when the case of Canada on the international scene is documented for them to have finished as my blog said they did for all those years and furthermore learning how weak their teams have been, with weak playing bridge politicians preempting spots on the team, all in spite of being blessed with the most favored position in the whole rest of the world (largely due to my original influence) and then investigating (which should be easy for them) but never commenting or, of course apologizing for standing around doing nothing, but only readying themselves for the next fictitious accusation. As an aside, can you imagine how embarrassing those putrid finishes were for me to accept (and for well over a decade) since I was a representative of Zone 2.

As I am sure you especially are aware, I could pursue these sad character traits with them until eternity but why should I? It is hard to imagine how they could have any self-esteem left, but my nose tells me differently and I suspect tomorrow it will continue to be business, as usual.

Then when I see you and Judy exchanging ugly emails about at least perceived differences in interpretation on reporting bridge, it gets very hard to stomach. At least your back and forth is based on differences in degrees of bridge reporting, not outright untruths, contrived motives and downright absurdities without ever responding to Canada’s shameful international past.

Furthermore, when I reported to you about the Kehela appearance in the Foster Tribunals you spoke of libel before you even checked it out. Were you trying to show your friends how patriotic you are or were you just joining them with your theatre of the ABSURD!

The end result is that I am thoroughly confused who you are. Very recently I thought you and I were good friends with you realizing that, when I relate a bridge happening it is with full knowledge of telling the truth. Evidently you do not feel that way and perhaps it is because of who your bridge friends really are. If you still feel differently, I would appreciate you informing me what I have told you which wasn’t 100% true.

Sorry for the unpleasantness, but when you start questioning my integrity, I take it seriously.

Bobby

Judy Kay-WolffApril 10th, 2010 at 12:46 am

Cam:

I think Bobby’s above comments really tell it as it is. When the biased, uninformed upstarts don’t like what they read, they just move on to their next project or attempted victim. Bobby is accountable for his actions and stands behind his documented words. He’s gone the whole nine yards and not from the bleachers — but has been right there on the field and in the dugout. No second-hand report from this guy — straight from the Wolff’s eyes, ears and mouth!

As for me — I have no regrets for my anger and no remorse for my strong response. I (here in the States) was raised to be sensitive to someone’s feelings (unless their integrity, morals or ethics are in question) which undoubtedly is not applicable here. I suppose it has a lot to do with one’s upbringing. Your lengthy explanation and continuing pride in being the “messenger” of such an “amusing” story has caused me to lose all respect I ever had for you. Perhaps I should be blaming Eric Murray as well. Some people derive pleasure at the expense of others. That is not my creed and I pray I never change.

Go pick on someone your own age! Au revoir!

JKW

Nick KrnjevicApril 11th, 2010 at 12:57 am

Cam;

For where I stand your conciliatory effort was commendable. The absence of reciprocity is regrettable.

Cheers.

Gary M. MugfordApril 11th, 2010 at 4:11 am

Cam,

Judy and I enjoy a mostly collegial email friendship where there are occasions where we have finally, through dint of determined friendliness, to agree to disagree on some subjects. I’m more on the side of amusing here rather than sneaky. I’ll tell you about one operation that was performed on Murray and how he responded.

When I was a high school freshmen on March break, the director at the local club where I’d played all of two times, called me to see if I was interested in going down to the Port Credit Yacht Club and playing an afternoon club game. He was a teacher at the school I’d attended the year before. The very first hand went one something, double by my teacher/partner and pass. The opponents were respectively Kehela and Murray. I had a flat bust and did what any beginning player might do with no points and no previous instruction. I passed. My partner let his glasses slide down to the end of his nose and tut-tutted all the way to the five overtricks finish. “You never, ever, ever, pass with no points.” Kehela and Murray continued as if nothing happened.

Maybe three years later, a high school chum and I drove into the city from the ‘burbs to play at the St. Clair Club. We were a bit late and Franco Bandoni and somebody else sat in for us for a round. We then jumped into our seats. My partner passed and Murray opened a club. I bid three diamonds, after which Murray’s partner (not Kehela) doubled. It went pass-pass-pass and I managed to take the last trick with my long diamond, having made the call with six diamonds to the ten and nothing else. With the vulnerability and old scoring, it was a clear top. It was also prompted by my partner’s habit of never seeing 11 points he didn’t thing were worth opening and bidding twice. (Sorry Judy, I know that smacks of a hidden partnership agreement).

The ‘ol Barrister’s response? He turned to me and dryly noted, “I see you’ve learned to bid with no points.” And then he pulled the cards from the next board.

I guess being willing to operate yourself gives you the ability to be sanguine when it happens to you. I’m sure Murray’s long-ago score against Stoney wasn’t the first, nor the last operation of his stellar career. Neither was Stone’s outburst. Tactically, I have always wondered whether a first-board operation might actually be a winning tactic against the ballistically-inclined (and yeah, I’m one of them). Never did it quite to that extent, but I do remember being overly-aggressive early a time or two against unknown opponents and then retreating to being the solid have-what-I-promise partner I became later in life.

Psyches create stories, win OR lose. I’m sure we WOULD have heard about a number if Murray had brought it back to his partners. If only as a cautionary tale. Mind you, he would have done it again, some time later. And again, until it worked. The beauty of Bridge is that there are decades to do everything at least once.

Or until it works.

Judy Kay-WolffApril 11th, 2010 at 3:21 pm

Gary:

It is one thing to laugh at your own ignorance, naivete or inexperience at the table. That is your prerogative. It is even, in my opinion, not a cardinal sin (if it is one of the more laughable, ego-boosting highlights of your career) to include it in a book bought by some (and then, as we learned, passed from person to person to person as they were too cheap to buy it, and eventually returned to the original purchaser — with appreciation). The story is fleeting and often forgotten soon as read by the average individual — but I took exception to seeing it in living color before the thousands and thousands of readers all over cyberspace. I suppose I can’t view it from the eyes of a journalist (either professional or self-styled) but rather as a sensitive human being and I am beginning to realize that some people are not what they are cracked up to be. Sadly, I now begin to question the motivation of many of those I thought I knew and respected! Life’s little surprises.

As you know, Norman and Edgar played on many teams successfully, but Edgar, the guru, was not enamored with the Canadian’s style of bidding and he quite often reminded them of his position. Each evening we would all return to The Kaplan Suite for some drinks and goodies over post mortems. One night I remember Edgar saying something to the effect, “Let’s get on with it. I don’t want to suffer through your auction … just tell me your final result!” Funny how those words echoed in my ears after some thirty or so years — revived by recent events. Nobody’s perfect but it’s more entertaining when the shoe is on the other foot!

Judy

John ThomasApril 19th, 2010 at 5:51 am

Thank you for the amusing story. Only goes to remind us that even world class players are human, which some seem to have forgotten: like the comment about ‘cannot shine the shoes’. That comment just shows that the the commentor is a snob (there, I said it), which is pathetic. Add to that the arrogance and it is also irritating (even to some random, clueless and lowly person like me).

Kudos to Cam in dealing with this in a polite manner.

IMO, people who don’t find this amusing ought to get their heads checked.

Ron LelApril 19th, 2010 at 6:32 am

I also findthis story very funny and am sure that Tobias Stone would now as well. This is the second time that Judy’s fame has spread to rgb.

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